The child that makes me feel like . . .

a bad parent. That child would be Larien. She's so beautiful. She's so lovely to behold. She can be so very sweet and loving. She's polite. She's considerate of other children in her class and on the playground. She's an angel with my sister, Maverick.

Then, there is the other side. Call it the dark side of the force that drives Larien. The child that can fight eating with unending tenacity, even with the promise of a dessert looming. No manner of incentive can get her to take a nap.

The other day I took her to the park so she could have some play time while waiting for her sister to finish school. I gave her all of the warnings: We're going to leave in ten minutes; We're going to leave in five minutes; Two minutes, Larien. When it was time to leave she ran from me, screaming. I had to get her with Finwe hanging on my left arm. I carried her under my right arm as she screamed the entire time.

She ran from me again on Friday when I picked her up at school. She even had the promise of cupcakes at home for Finwe's birthday and the arrival of the much beloved Aunt Maverick. None of that satisfied her. She still ran. The teachers had to help me get her to the van.

What is so different about her? Why is that Inwe acquiesces and will sacrifice for that reward and Larien will not? These are rhetorical questions. Larien is just who she is. I labeled her as trouble (rather jokingly) when she was 4 months old. She certainly can be.

However, for as many moments as I want to lock her in her room there are four times as many moments that I melt when I look at her or hear her voice.